knots in my stomach.

so. tomorrow morning I will be meeting with my pastor- Isaac Canales. He is such an awesome person. but anyway. at 6:30 AM i will be driving down the 405 to have my first "mentor meeting/session/one-on-one/whatever" (i'm not sure what you call it) but im excited. It's such a privilege to be able to learn from this Godly man. We are going to go through books of the Bible and he will teach some things that he has learn throughout his life. shoots. I'm excited. I want to learn.. become a better person..woman.. and Christian.

i just hope i dont get there late. ha.

gah..

I was living under the assumption that I was going to stay an extra semester at VU through a study abroad program-
-yesterday- i found out that I only need 13 units to finish my college career-so I can't stay an extra semester. boo.. ( basically my financial aid can't cover it because I don't technically need the extra semester)

What will I do? I have so many options...
1. Apply to a Nursing School in the East Coast (Boston) I want to become a midwife or a nurse so that I can better serve people around the world-not only bringing them Truth, but also meeting their physical needs.

2. Apply to USC for a MSW

3. Join the Peace Corps

4. Head to South America- Join a missionary for a long term commitment. My motto: Go big or go home.

5. Stick around in Carson...

Now- I will be praying and seeking God's will for my life...

devotional

I really enjoy this quote.. .

Once I press myself into action, I immediately begin to live. Anything less is merely existing. The momens I truly live re the moments when I act with my entire will..

-My utmost for his highest..

i miss my brothers and sisters.. .

SO. Lately I haven't been hanging out with my siblings. I have been doing a lot things with my friends from VU and from back at home.(RARE- I haven't been spending quality time with my brothers and sisters. )I miss them a lot. And today it hit me the hardest. At the caf I saw a brother and a sister eating dinner, one of my friends only tagged her family on a note she wrote on facebook, in my interpersonal class we were talking about how our parent's parenting technique shapes our gender identity.But I would have to argue that my siblings played a larger role in my gender identity, oh and I guess the Holiday Season is around the corner and that always stirs up feelings..

Anyway, I am going home this Wednesday. Hopefully i get to see my brothers (especially. )

a history Lesson..

Now. I am pretty sure I am going to ramble.

Halloween. Free Candy. Dressing up. Perfect holiday for children, righ? . Growing up in a Chrisitina/Hispanic home with a super conservative mother and father. The likelihood of me partcipating in the All-School Halloween parade, going trick-treating, throwing a Halloween Party, dressing up as a princess or at least Mary NEVER happened throughout my early years. Oh the deprivation of goodies. they thought by celebrating Halloween we were worshiping The SATAN.

I have a lot respect for my mom. I also love living on the edge. haha. So on Friday evening- I did the unthinkable. As my mother and I were preparing dinner. I told my mom. "I am going out to get candy on Saturday Night." Her response- "Bring some candy home". I was shocked! What? No debate, no discussion. Wow.That's it. I was floored. (I am going to ask her why she was so cool with me going trick-treating- be on the look out for the next issue. )This was unheard of. No one in my family ever celebrated Halloween. My siblings and I came to the conclusion long ago that my parents are old and they have fixed values, beliefs, traditions, etc.. We can't change their frame of thinking. We can only change ourselves. If ever we want to see change in our family, community, and world it begins with us. I am a true pioneer. lol.

So. Saturday Night I roamed the streets of Balboa Island. And on Wednesday my mom will be eating Halloween Candy. This is revolutionary!

Find me behind joe's head.. lol









So. Here is a clip of the Ancient Origin of Halloween. I know. I'm a nerd.

According to the History website, The Celts, who lived 2,000 years ago in the area that is now Ireland, the United Kingdom, and northern France, celebrated their new year on November 1. This day marked the end of summer and the harvest and the beginning of the dark, cold winter, a time of year that was often associated with human death. Celts believed that on the night before the new year, the boundary between the worlds of the living and the dead became blurred. On the night of October 31, they celebrated Samhain, when it was believed that the ghosts of the dead returned to earth. In addition to causing trouble and damaging crops, Celts thought that the presence of the otherworldly spirits made it easier for the Druids, or Celtic priests, to make predictions about the future. For a people entirely dependent on the volatile natural world, these prophecies were an important source of comfort and direction during the long, dark winter.

To commemorate the event, Druids built huge sacred bonfires, where the people gathered to burn crops and animals as sacrifices to the Celtic deities. During the celebration, the Celts wore costumes, typically consisting of animal heads and skins, and attempted to tell each other's fortunes. When the celebration was over, they re-lit their hearth fires, which they had extinguished earlier that evening, from the sacred bonfire to help protect them during the coming winter.